Every morning when I sit down to write, my mind is almost blank. I have a thousand thoughts but none of them are worth writing about. Should I write about the massive shopping list that I am dreading financially? Or should it be about productivity hacks? Maybe I want to write about Ratul and his train journey. Or, maybe today is going to be about science communication. It is scary to sit down in front of a blank piece of paper. But then I type down the first letter, and then the next. And eventually I get to my five hundred words. The reason, I think, why this method works very well, is being able to see what I wrote in written form is a powerful feedback. It gives me the agency to write more, because I can keep seeing its results on my iPad screen.
I think clarity of agency is what makes something from not-interesting to interesting, from difficult to doable. By itself I also find it hard to define, it has to come with clear tangible feedback. Let's take an example, working out. If one is working out every day, in hopes of losing weight, there is a higher likelihood that they might not stick to their plan (as we see with gym signups). I think, that is because they haven't found exactly what they have agency on. As an individual, almost no one would see the effects of working out until much later; they lack the feedback they need to experience agency. And without the experience of agency, it is a bit like shouting into the void. Eventually one gets frustrated. I think it is a fundamental part of being a human, to seek agency. Without it, we wither.
This is also why scrolling through algorithmically curated social media is not particularly healthy; because it is faking agency of the individual. It boils all the actions down the most minimal until of interaction, a scroll; but gives a disproportionate amount of interesting stuff, designed to be enjoyed by that specific individual. It is predatory towards our minds; disrespectful of our time and most importantly, akin to manipulation. Exploiting one of our fundamental human nature, for advertisement revenue, seems a bit untowardly towards humanity. But I suppose that is capitalism in essence. And I cannot complain, capitalism has made much of life convenient.
I wonder how we do regain and retain agency. And I cannot come up something useful usually. Except one art form; video games. Not any video game, most popular video games are guilty the same way how social media platforms are guilty. But there are video games, usually the most difficult ones, are the ones that give the player agency in their design. Difficulty for the sake of it is pointless, same way, inconvenience for the sake of it is pointless1. Most of the good video games have a very specific feature. It makes sure to let its' player know that is it not unfair. A video game might appear difficult, but usually it is because one is not looking at it right.
- Like the resurgence of vinyl; though I collect them, for the cover mostly. ↩︎